Eleanor Conway brings her bold, hilarious perimenopausal perspective to Leicester Square Theatre this November! With 200 million views for her candid takes on sex, dating, and childfree living, the award-winning comedian gives us her sharp insights on everything from disastrous live performances to Germans.
What’s your most memorable heckle?
When I was first starting out, I hosted a late-night EdFringe show which used to get quite rowdy.
It’s a raucous Saturday night show, and I’m on stage in a ringmaster outfit and boxing gloves. A man gets up to go to the bathroom, and the whole audience erupts and starts chanting loudly, “piss in a cup… piss in a cup… piss in a cup”. There is no heckle put-down for that. I had no idea what to do. Plus, I’m drunk.
So, I did the only thing I could think of. I finished my drink and gave him my cup. I got sober very soon after that.
Who’s the best up-and-coming performer in the country that we haven’t heard of?
She’s not up-and-coming, but she’s my friend and a brilliant comic – Daisy Earl. She’s genuinely the funniest person I know.
Who would you describe as your arch-nemesis?
The bastard that stole my Amazon package from the foyer of my building and then opened the box and dumped it up the road. I don’t understand why they didn’t like it. They seem like the type of person that would appreciate a spice rack.
When was the time you bombed the most onstage?
When I was mistakenly booked for a daytime gig in a big theatre during EdFringe and had to do my dirtiest stuff because that’s all I had. It still makes me shudder.
What’s been your strangest fan encounter?
A hookup told me afterwards that he hated my stuff. I’m not sure who I hate more, him for being a twat or me for enjoying the sex.
Where’s your favourite place to tour?
London and Germany. London, obviously, because I love sleeping in my own bed, and London has a vibe. And Germany because I love Germans – they’re super blunt and direct, and for someone that HATES small talk, I love it.
How do you like to relax after a gig?
I used to love getting smashed and then, two days later, I’d have a dead phone, be wearing a jumper I didn’t own, and be trying to navigate my way home from some random part of London using the maps in bus shelters. A crazy night these days is walking through the door and not immediately doing a 5-step skincare routine. Wild.
What’s the one thing you want the audience to take away from your show?
Permission to be angry. It’s glorious.
Would you rather have fingers as long as your legs or legs as long as your fingers?
Fingers as long as your legs. I’d embark on a pickpocketing spree.
Who would win in a fight: Badger or Baboon?
A baboon obviously. Anyone that walks around with their butthole on show is way more unhinged.
Eleanor Conway: No Phones in the Hot Tub, 21 November.