Alasdair Beckett-King’s Leicester Square Questionnaire

What’s your most memorable heckle?
A child once pointed at me and yelled, “Elvis!”

I don’t know who you think Elvis is, kid.

Where do you go for your pre/post Leicester Square Theatre gig food?
There’s a vegan Chinese restaurant in London that I think is run by a cult. The food is great, but there’s a widescreen TV that’s always showing footage of someone called “The Leader”. It’s a mixture of songs (about The Leader), stock footage of beautiful landscapes and information about The Global Agenda.

I don’t feel great about going there, but it’s hard to find vegan wontons.

What’s one word to describe the state of the UK?
Dyspeptic.

Who’s the best upcoming performer in the country that we haven’t heard of?
A hard-working little scamp called ABK.

Who would you describe as your arch-nemesis?
I actually get along well with arches.

When was the time you bombed the most onstage?
I was on first at a Christmas gig. I knew I was doomed when the compere promised a hilarious night of comedy and a man in the back row quietly said, “We’ll be the judge of that.”

What’s been your strangest fan encounter?
In general, my fans are highly intellectual and strikingly attractive people. And I’m always delighted when they take a break from painting Warhammer miniatures or building a wicker man to come and see me perform.

How do you like to relax after a gig?
Why relax when you can think about climate change?

What’s the one thing you want the audience to take away from your show?
I like it when people take their glasses back to the bar. Show the venue staff a little respect, you animals!

Would you rather have fingers as long as your legs or legs as long as your fingers?
I don’t think I would, no.

Who would win in a fight: Badger or Baboon?
They share a common enemy in the capitalist class.

What’s the oddest thing you’ve overheard in London?
I heard someone say, “I travelled to London and to Manchester, north of London.”

Alasdair Beckett-King’s The Interdimensional ABK tour culminates at Leicester Square Theatre on 17 and 18 June 2023.